We do have a plan. We always have a plan. As much as Wilderheart and I love spontaneity, when it comes to our family's well-being, we thrive on planning.
Unfortunately, in the world of self-employment, paychecks tend to be more... spontaneous. And plans must constantly be rewritten as circumstances change.
We have weathered a great many changes in the past year. Last year this time, Munchkin and I spent a lot of our time weeding our garden, harvesting vegetables and watching traffic pass by out in front of the house. We took family trips to the lake, visited family and friends for summer cook outs, and had a relatively low-stress existence. We could see the dust cloud of uncertainty on the horizon, but I don't think that either of us truly knew how far things would spiral or what tough choices we would be faced with making.
Having just written that, however, I do have to laugh at the concept of "tough choices." Wilderheart and I have never had to chose who would go without dinner so our child could eat. We have never had to chose who will move a thousand miles away for work while the other tries to eek out an existence alone. We have been blessed over and over, and know little of true suffering.
When it comes to the adventure we are currently enjoying, we do have a plan. We have benchmarks and limits and structure to this plan. We will not abandon everything and go willy-nilly off the deep end. Through our great deal of experience having plans go awry, we have B-Z in back-up plans. We put Munchie's welfare first above all and our family's safety second. Our sense of adventure and free-spirited prancing across the countryside is somewhere down on the list, but it would certainly never trump #1 and #2. Ever.
And quite frankly, I would and do take great offense to anyone who would even bring that into question. I am Munchie's Mother. I AM Dracomama. You don't want to see the Dragon come out. It is my privilege to provide her with safety and comfort and entertainment and knowledge. I am blessed to have her in my care.
No decision about our existence will be made without taking Munchie's well-being into account. ABOVE ALL.
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Did someone say something out of line to prompt this post? or just something you've been wanting to get off your chest...
ReplyDelete'cause if someone said something, you know I'll be there in less than a heartbeat to pound them into the ground. :)
-Ash
I can't believe anyone would even question your dedication to the care and welfare of your child. And to see her so happy and giving and carefree, well, I think you're doing a damn fine job. A place is a place is a place, and the location of the four walls that shelters a person doesn't mean much in the end compared to food in the belly and love in the heart.
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